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  1. “I’ll allow one chair throw at halftime, Mel. ONE. Make it count!” Excuse the good folks of Charlotte, North Carolina if they’re tuning out of social media tonight, shortly after today’s affair between their Hornets and the Atlanta Hawks (1 PM Eastern, Bally Sports Southeast in CHA and ATL, 92.9 FM in ATL). Following up on great documentaries reviewing the NFL’s 1983 and the NBA’s 1984 draft classes, NBATV is airing “Ready Or Not”, the stories of the many noteworthy players who put on shiny, baggy suits and shook David Stern’s hand at the 1996 NBA Draft. Charlotte’s a lov
  2. “Myyyyy kind of big, CAPELA is…” According to the tale told by the United States Golf Association, a former manager at New York City’s prestigious Waldorf Astoria hotel and part-owner at the Biltmore, was playing a round at a golf course where he was a member, the Country Club of Montreal. The native Canadian, David Mulligan lined up, swung from his shoe-tops at the tee, and was way, way off. Looks like no Masters for you, Davey Boy! His foursome buddies found it all the more hilarious that, instead of heading for the forest to play that ball, he reached for another one, and s
  3. “Hi, there! It’s me, Jaren Jackson, Jr.!” Taylor Jenkins gets it. This is no time for hibernation! The Memphis Grizzlies pulled themselves together in what was supposed to be the middle of last season. They climbed to 28-26 before the All-Star Break, then bounced back from a post-All-Star swoon, and the loss of Jaren Jackson, Jr. to a sprained knee, with a run that included a pair of games pants-ing the Atlanta Hawks to return to .500 basketball. The playoffs, in year one for rookie coach Jenkins and rookie star Ja Morant, were in full view. Then, in a series of unfortuna
  4. “Join me in Boston, Al, and I guarantee you, within five years, we’ll be going places!” Big Birds! Bears and Bulls! Bugs, Brontosauruses and Bucks! Over the course of this home-friendly schedule over the next two weeks, continuing with the New Orleans Pelicans in town tonight (7:30 PM Eastern, Bally Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, BS New Orleans), we can hope the Atlanta Hawks will be the busiest “Bs”, building up their hive while still delivering the biggest stings. Two Sundays from now, the 20th-winningest coach in NBA history may be able to don his Kool Moe Dee getup,
  5. Nice try, Raptors. Play harder, next time! Tidbits! Welcome home, Hawks! I don’t know if Steph Curry will be a late scratch for this Sunday feast (7:30 PM Eastern, Bally Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, NBC Sports Bay Area in SFO, NBATV everywhere else). But especially if he’s a no-go, this return to State Farm Arena must be a winning one. No one needs to process the narrative of how a squad that consumed a 60-burger in Tampa, and left with a 50-burger in a doggie bag, pulled themselves together and won in Atlanta tonight. Trae and Gallo are available, for all the more rea
  6. “Listen! Just form a (BLEEP!)ing levee around Skylar!” Mamas, please, don’t let your babies grow up to be podcasters. I kid. There are many fine podcast productions out there, featuring experts, humorists, special guests, and celebrities covering nearly every topic imaginable. It just feels like a good 28.7 percent of them are professional athletes just killing time. They’ve got ads now, too. According to sports radio during breaks every twenty minutes, Duncan Robinson of The University of Freakin’ Michigan has one called, “The Long Shot”, where he and a co-host get to ba
  7. “Even Denzel knew better than messing around with Godzilla! Kong doesn’t stand a chance!” So, this is gonna be it, right? Atlanta Hawks versus Gregg Popovich: The Finale? Ever since the Spurs’ GM hopped on board the team bus in Oakland after a loss in 1996 and stunned the players by declaring he was taking over for Bob Hill, it has been a long ride for Coach Pop. 1,301 regular season wins later, Popovich has three annual Coach of the Year awards, a sterling 5-1 record in The Finals, and a coaching legacy tree that looks more like kudzu. Aside from a couple years at Golden Stat
  8. “The Shining (2011)” Happy Ten-Year Anniversary! Ten! What is that, aluminum? Paper? Velvet? Are ya feeling old yet, Squawkfolk? It seemed like yesterday when a former referee, one that even other refs couldn’t stand, snuck around Atlanta Hawks postgame security aiming to shame team vice prez, color analyst and living legend Dominique Wilkins in hopes of collecting what the former claimed was a debt. Well, don’t call him Eric B., because the homie Rashan Michel got Paid In Fist. After dispatching Hoosier legend Mike Woodson and giving his assistant Larry Drew a head coach
  9. “Haven’t you heard, Joker? I am The Greatest Offensive Player to Ever Play in the NBA!” The Lords of Steady Internet Connection haven’t been kind this weekend, so just a couple tidbits ahead of today’s rematch in Denver between the Atlanta Hawks and the Nuggets (9 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, Altitude TV in DEN). Who’s probably the only person to ever successfully transform from a Kitten into a Bulldog? This is your annual complaint that Paul Millsap should have had his number retired at Louisiana Tech by now. The folks in Ruston, who take pride in call
  10. Presented, without context. “I’m the greatest defender the NBA has ever seen!”, crowed a paraphrased Draymond Green, for no good reason whatsoever. He’s not exactly “King of the World!” on some Titanic, but he is standing out there on deck, just daring the Evergreen cargo-bros of the world to come at him. With nobody around Pennsylvania Avenue to trade potshots, Dray’s head coach, Steve Kerr, now spends his time doing introspective podcasts, and taking umbrage at misguided muckrakers reading too deeply into them. Kelly Oubre is cutting off press conference attendees wading to
  11. “So what are you waiting for, Tasha? Nate McMillan and Melvin Hunt to help you plan dessert?” Finally! The pride of Chino Hills, now a Lottery pick and a prized NBA rookie, has come back to Los Angeles! That’s right. Onyeka Okongwu brings his Atlanta Hawks to STAPLES Center for a pair of games versus NBA title contenders over the coming days. That includes today’s matinee with the defending NBA champ Los Angeles Lakers (3:30 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL; Spectrum SportsNet in LAX). Only one other current NBA player – momentary Magic Man Aaron Gordon
  12. “Excuse me, Mister Schlenk? I believe you dropped your hat.” Y’all know what time it is. TRADE DEADLINE KARAOKE! First, the particulars. Hawks and Kings (10 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, NBC Sports California) Gallo (knee contusion, questionable) missed most of the fourth quarter on Monday as the Hawks (22-21, 5.0 games ahead of 11th seed in NBA East) finally ran out of gas after letting up off the pedal in the third. Dunn and Cam remain out. Bogi’s back in town, but the Kangz are alright. Bags, Metu and Ramsey out for p
  13. “Ask Kenny and Chauncey to slide over. We’ve got to make room for Sister Jean.” L.A., it appears, isn’t proving too much for these men. The Hawks took care of business against the abridged Lakers on Saturday afternoon, setting up an opportunity for an L.A. parlay with the Clippers (10:00 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, Fox Sports Prime Ticket in LAX). Atlanta (22-20) last pulled off the STAPLES Center sweep when they beat Julius Randle’s 12-51 Lakers, and CP3’s 40-21 Clippers club that had lost Blake Griffin for over two months, on consecutive nights in 20
  14. “ATLAAAAAANTA, GEORGIA! Where the wins come sweepin’ up from Plains!” How much farther out can our Atlanta Hawks build this springboard? The Hawks are in no position to look past Al Horford and the visiting Oklahoma City Thunder at State Farm Arena this evening (7:30 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, Fox Sports Oklahoma). But a couple weeks ago, when the back-half schedule was finally revealed, many of us fans were staring at that long, arduous Western road trip, wondering just how bad the plunge was about to get. What we didn’t have at the time was a p
  15. “…starring CHRISTIAN WOOD, in a Very Special episode of The Fresh Prince of Bellaire.” Houston… y’all done been had problems! This is all the Astros’ fault, you know. Those sheisty sign-stealers’ rendition of “Bang the Can Slowly (2017)” brought Houston their long-coveted World Series trophy. But the price for that is bad mojo, in the form of a litany of mopey stars, and their coaches, hightailing out of town as fast as they can. 2017 Series MVP George Springer can’t even go to Toronto, yet he still inked a deal with the Blue Jays to try getting the stink of the Stros’ si
  16. “Who’s prepared to pay the price? For a trip to paradise?” It’s the Cleveland State Vikings, and the Georgia State Panthers, in a play-in matchup to determine which team will get to face the top-seeded… oh, excuse me? Yeah, that’s right, don’t call it a play-in. Let’s try this again, with a dash of NBA flavor, to taste. Tonight, live from Atlanta, it’s the Cleveland Cavaliers, visiting the Hawks (7:30 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, Fox Sports Ohio) in a race to determine who will be worthy of an opening-round matchup with the top-seed for the East Region.
  17. “BAG! ALERT! TRADING BAG ALERT!” I may or may not have shared this opinion in earlier gamethreads, but one of my Stone Cold Lock predictions for this season was that no Head Coaches would be fired. Not unless some sketchy old cellphone messages propped up, or something. Context matters, and you can’t get any more context for disappointing results in the standings and on the scoreboards than what this season offers. The shortened schedule, the lack of practice time, the lack of homecourt advantage, lengthy road trips, illness absences, hasty roster changes, revenue-strapped own
  18. “Well, of course, his real name is Herb, Wanda! Why, what else would it be? Herbert?” Hail! Hail! The Gang’s all here! I care a heckuva lot now. It looks like we’ve all survived The All-Star Weekend of Our Discontent, and with nary a scratch! Bravo! Hawks Inc. and the NBA pulled off All-Star Sunday swimmingly well. HBCUs and the students were shining brightly. Further, The City was looking good from a bird’s-eye view, particularly if your particular avian species could fly high enough to avoid the occasional stray slugs. Luka ain’t win a dadgum thing on our court, even th
  19. “Trust me, Lloyd, this head coaching biz can make you grow gray hairs fast. In places.” Supersonic motivating rhymes are creating. And everybody knows that Ohhh heyyy! It’s Ya Boi. Thanks to some divine intervention from our #1 Atlanta Hawks fan, The “Don’t Call Me Olivia” Pope (“What am I,” he groused, “some kind of miracle worker?”), it looks like I’m back in my happily unpaid internship gig, on the grind to deliver more long-winded pregame commentary. Through this NBA All-Star Break, at least. At this season’s long-awaited tip-off, if you told me about The First Eastern Con
  20. “Don’t sweat the game tonight, Trae. Just chalk it up to a Bad Hair Day.” STATEMENT FROM THE ATLANTA HAWKS BASKETBALL CLUB ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- “Accountability matters,” says Principal Owner, and Chair of the Board of Directors for the Atlanta Hawks Basketball Club, Tony Ressler. “When we’re losing for weeks on end, and the performance on the floor is not up to snuff, someone has to be held accountable.” For that reason, the Hawks have relieved Lethal Weapon 3 (“LW3”) of his duties as Head Gamethread Writer (“HGW”) at, effective immediately after tonight’s g
  21. “Stop the game! That jersey clashes with our pink and blue!” “What’s our record, Jordan, with our #fullsquad?”, David Lee wanted to know. He didn’t know to add the hashtag yet, while pressing his postgame media contingent. But he would, soon. “What’s our record? #Fullsquad. When we have everybody? Does anybody know what our record is? When we’ve got Andre, and Steph, and everybody in the lineup? We’re pretty darn good.” The excitement had been waning for Lee’s emerging Golden State Warriors. Coming off a breakthrough 2012-13 season, where the Dubs won their first playoff serie
  22. “HOW YOU LOSIN’ TO THE CAVS AGAIN? DAYYUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNN!” “There’s No Chemistry!”, we’re told, when something named Lamar Stevens looks like a dadgum DuPont Factory on wheels strolling down the lane untouched in the clutch. Whatever. In usual Atlanta Sports years, by the time our Hawks had blown their 10th fourth-quarter lead of the season (as per 92.9’s Mike Conti), we’d be occupied with United fooling around in the playoffs, fretting over the Dawgs getting stonewalled by Saban, and watching Matty Ice waltz for his life behind a slushy O-Line. More often than not, we’r
  23. “Alright, who leaked out that our coach voted for Horford and Scary Terry?” The NBA Blender is funny. Isaiah Thomas had long imagined that he, and a former Atlanta Hawks star, would play as a professional pair in a critical tournament game. As the self-made, former Boston Celtics star sipped on a socially-distanced margarita in San Juan last week, there’s no way he could have imagined, five years ago, that his ex-Hawk co-star would be Joe Johnson. It was at the All-Star midseason classic, in 2016, when I.T. whispered sweet nothings into Al Horford’s ear. Join me in Boston
  24. “WHO WANTS TO SEXTON?” Michael Carter-Williams had arrived. 22 points, 12 assists, 9 steals, to help his lottery team defeat the juggernaut defending NBA champs in his professional debut. The sky was the limit. Brandon Jennings made his grand entrance. 55 points on national TV, while a fellow rookie named Stephen Curry watched from the bench. A star was born. Jamaal Tinsley’s big moment was here. A triple double, featuring 19 points, 11 rebounds, and 23 assists, as a rookie, in a win against MJ’s Wizards. Pass the torch! The ceiling is the roof!
  25. “No, seriously, Bama, how did we let this guy get away from our recruiters?” Our Atlanta Hawks got next-to-no help in the Leastern Conference standings, not in the intervening days between their first win since April 2018 against the Boston Celtics, and the rematch at TD Garden tonight (7:30 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, NBC Sports Boston). Not unless we’re trying to catch the Bucks. The Lakers that could play were a hot mess against the Nets that could play yesterday. The T’wolves tried their best by dragging Indiana into OT on Wednesday but ran out of