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“Excuse me, Mister Schlenk? I believe you dropped your hat.” Y’all know what time it is. TRADE DEADLINE KARAOKE! First, the particulars. Hawks and Kings (10 PM Eastern, Fox Sports Southeast and 92.9 FM in ATL, NBC Sports California) Gallo (knee contusion, questionable) missed most of the fourth quarter on Monday as the Hawks (22-21, 5.0 games ahead of 11th seed in NBA East) finally ran out of gas after letting up off the pedal in the third. Dunn and Cam remain out. Bogi’s back in town, but the Kangz are alright. Bags, Metu and Ramsey out for playoff-starved Sacto (18-25, 3.5 games behind 10th seed in NBA West), who host GSW tomorrow night and might put some trade bait on bubble wrap tonight. Luke’s starting Baby Boy in a 3-guard starting lineup to stay afloat, and the Kangz have since won 3 of 4. Please, nobody trade Harrison mid-game. Now, somebody please press Play on Trader Trav’s boombox. L L Cool P Was Mid As H<BRRRNT> Throttle any GM, I don’t care who you t<BRRRNT> I exp<BRRRNT> coaches who fai<BRRRNT> Gonna<BRRNT> upsca<BRRNT> my Hawks <BRRNT> as I Swap<BRRNT> for Snells!<BRRRNT> You’ve been waitin’ and debatin’ for so many years Just starvin’ like Marvin to get the heck outta here I allayed fears that I strayed, kept Coach Pierce on too long Perish thoughts, it’s why I brought Nate McMillan along Passin’ up on K-Love, Cavs get no remorse Emphasizin’, Trae dimin’, settin’ records, of course I devour, by the hour, trades beyond the pale Nate Mac killin’, drawin’ plays up with his fat toe nail Swap for Snells! The King of Flexibility is finally back Cap space been replaced, still a problem we lack Wacky Wizards, slick as lizards, wish they had Johnny Bap I dishonor Kev O’Connor, stupid rumors I slap Rondo’s kickin’, Dunn is stricken, what more can I say Don’t misstep, so you’re not left with your Restricteds in play Nate McMillan out here chillin’, my new right-hand man We trade for Snells so very well, ‘cause that’s the GM I am Swap for Snells! Some pundits like my deals, and some just won’t But I got all the assets that their dream teams don’t Capela and Snell, Bogi, Gallo, Red Vel, Sucka GMs wish that they had dudes this swell Swap for Snells! Trae’s All-Star gold, whether you like it or not His steady hand’s Dunk Creatin’, while Rondo stirs the pot They’ll even slip it out to Solo, new Laker villain What’s my new coach name? “NATE McMILLAN!” Trade Deadline’s my show, y’know the power I wield Go and stretch out on my couch, call me Landry Fields Soon we’ll play Cam and ‘Dre, they’re like penicillin What’s my new coach name? “NATE McMILLAN!” Now you know, we gonna roll Gallo and Bogi Out there for threes and make foes fold So all you crappy-lookin’, slappy Lotto teams step back ‘Cause there’s a ten-to-one chance I ain’t tradin’ jack Swap for Snells! … The ball is circulatin’, and my team’s makin’ gains Don’t give me lip, here’s a tip: “TRADER TRAV’S THE NAME!” Nate McMillan’s “GOOD!” Ice Trae is “GOOD! GOOD!” I bring the Brandon Goodwins, you bring the goods The bigs are pickin’, Collins rippin’ straight to the hole Why did we can Cool P? “WE LIKE PICK AND ROLL!” ‘Cause these ain’t the gory days with A.S.G. I’m not a virgin so I know that I’m no A.C. Green Y’all hate coaching by Pierce, criticism so fierce Now I ditched him, for the mission. Can I have a few cheers? Swap for Snells! Now ‘preciate my grind, got GMs in a bind Got Nate Knight for somethin’ light, made your GM look blind So all Ujiri-head Raptors wantin’ Hawks that can hoop Quit your feenin’, what I mean is, don’t get duped-duped-duped All you conned Moreys, Connellys, when will you learn? Swingin’ heists like Trader Trav? That’s a rep that you earn Some Squawkers criticize me, but I’m not concerned Kris D plays playoff minutes, that is all that I yearn Trae’s winnin’ and grinnin’, rockin’ MLKs Would you rather Reggie Jackson? “WE LIKE SKY MAYS!” That’s right. No need to fight with the Kangz and the Pels Courtside Karens, they be blarin’, while our whole fanbase yells, Swap for Snells! Let’s Go Hawks! ~lw3