top 10 hawksquawkers, revision #1

[drzachary]

top 10 hawksquawkers

version 1.0

featuring DieselMath™

Introduction:

Hawksquawk is a place that is very important to us. It is a place of joy, a place of drama, and a place of comedy. It is not just a collection of words, but a collection of people -- and their personalities. This is not a popularity contest (though it is somewhat ironic that #1-3 match the most profilic posters), but simply my attempt at quantifying, using the best statistical measures used by advocate climatologists everywhere (i.e. making things up), the Top 10 Hawksquawkers. The envelope please.....

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01. Diesel

02. Lascar78

03. KB21

04. Graymule

06. Wretch

07. Hotlanta

08. exodus

09. johnnybravo/theartist

10. MikePamfilis

11. drzachary

12. josh_smith_fan_1

13. Employee8

14. sturt

1. Diesel: What is there to say that hasn't been said? I'm greatly looking forward to meeting him at the Warriors game, buying him a beer, and attempting to unravel the mystery that is Diesel. Diesel is not only #1 on my Hawksquawkers list, but on my list of 'best human beings.' This is a real list that I keep.

2. Lascar: Lascar has successfully convinced me to change my mind more than any other poster. For those who argue with Lascar (or with anyone else who is usually right), bear this in mind: the best thing about admitting that you're wrong is that suddenly.. you get to be right again!

3. KB21: KB is the "juggernaut, b*tch" of Hawksquawk. Once he is in motion, he cannot be impeded by anything. His adherence to his beliefs is admirable, though in direct opposition to my thoughts regarding #2.

4. Graymule: I'm comfortable adding Graymule at #4, for solely serious reasons. He brings a serene sort of wisdom to the boards. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if Diesel is John the Baptist, Graymule is Jesus.

6. Wretch: Also winner of the 2006 inaugural R. Salvatore "Most Likely to Have a Dungeons & Dragons Related Tattoo Award," Wretch had provided us with some of the best photoshops over the years, and -- as we all know -- photoshops are what make the internets work.

7. Hotlanta1981: I will simply quote Final_quest's perfect summary: "I nominate Hotlanta. Even if the Hawks go on a 3 year championship run he would still hate the coach, players, and GM. Despite his sour disposition I insist that he probably volunteers at an orphanage or elderly home in his spare time. Just like that Simpson's episode where Moe is reading to children and starts crying after finishing the last line of Little Women. "They were no longer little girls, they were little women." Anyways, Hotlanta is vital to our community, and has to be a top ten Hawksquawk personality." I can't really add much to that.

8. exodus: One of the 'Squawk's biggest fans of statistics, one of his favorite numbers to bring up is the number of chromosomes of those of us who don't like Lue (who blows.) If I needed to wage an e-war against Diesel, exodus would be my general.

9. JohnnyBravo aka TheArtist: Johnny's inclusion on this list is partly due to his fantastic use of sarcasm, but mostly due to his episode in which he went absolutely crazy and reinvented himself as "TheArtist." I had never before seen such a online (and offline) descent into mental illness, and I hope to see it again sometime. Thank you for bringing joy to my life, Johnny.

10. Mike Pamfilis: My mind is so absolutely shattered by comprehending Michael P that I can only assess him in sentence fragments. Youthful exuberance. Disney world KISS. Nothing else to say.

11. drzachary: I don't want to toot my own horn too much, but I feel like this is a good spot for me.

12. josh_smith_fan_1: jsf1 burst onto to scene about a year and a half ago, and is probably the most dedicated of our single-player-fans.

13. Employee8: See #12, but he ran away when the Wiggle wiggled out of town.

14. sturt: .. because I'd get banned if I didn't include the founder....

** note: you will notice there is no #5. The fifth slot in this list is empty, symbolizing the hole left in my heart when Jay Walker moved away and stopped covering the Hawks. His dedication will NEVER be matched.

God/Allah/Jah/Zeus bless you all.

[kudzu23]

Thank God almighty 'you know who' isnt on your list...

[drzachary]

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Thank God almighty 'you know who' isnt on your list...

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Not really sure who you mean, seriously.

[shock]

I'd have to nominate chillzatl and crawdaddy.

[shock]

actually, i cant believe i left him out....BruceLevenson1

[AHF]

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chillzatl

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Employeenumber8 but no chillzatl?

[Wretch]

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11. drzachary: I don't want to toot my own horn too much, but I feel like this is a good spot for me.

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...that is just so funky fresh that I am at a loss for words! lol

Doood, I'm completely honored...just to be your fellow Squawker! But, alas I must nominate and defer to AHF and Chillz as much bigger pieces to the Squawk family than I.

[drzachary]

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chillzatl

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Employeenumber8 but no chillzatl?

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Oh my lord. I am truly an idiot. I never once realized that "chillz" may refer to Childress.

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... going to jump off a bridge now kthxbye

[Lascar78]

I like the list. I would add chillz, ahf, and nicholasp27 to the list, but I understand that you're trying to get a good mix of "I'm laughing with you" and "I'm laughing at you".

Personally, I would have AHF high on the list because the man has endless patience, I've never seen anything like it.

Also, how can you list josh_smith_fan_1 without naming martynas andriuskevicus???

[drzachary]

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I like the list. I would add chillz, ahf, and nicholasp27 to the list, but I understand that you're trying to get a good mix of "I'm laughing with you" and "I'm laughing at you".

Personally, I would have AHF high on the list because the man has endless patience, I've never seen anything like it.

Also, how can you list josh_smith_fan_1 without naming martynas andriuskevicus???

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How can I leave off people? How can I omit the (obvious) Martynas references? Easy: REVISION ONE

The top ten list doesn't really have any set number (DieselMath). I might even use letters, or Roman numerals.

I don't think I added anyone that I soley laugh at. Everyone is important in their own way, and a list like this couldn't really sum up the Hawksquawk Experience (sounds like a Six Flags boat-and-animatronics ride a la Monster Plantation!) no matter how much I tried.