Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 15, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 HAWKS TRAGIC NUMBER: (They just blew right on through the teens. Don't we all?) In lieu of focusing on individual teams, This Week In TANKWATCH will shine an unflattering, mid-season light on the Old Men that leave the NBA’s tank fans Grumpy. To zoom in on them, I’m applying the 20-30-30-30-30 rule: at least 20 minutes per night, 30 games played, aged 30 or over, but less than 30 wins and more than 30 losses this season on a non-playoff roster. PG: Jarrett Jack (Knicks) – But for Ron Baker’s season-ending injury, the Knicks would now have like five ball-handlers to choose from. Jeff Hornacek is fresh out of excuses as to why he refuses to turn the keys over to rookie Frank Ntilikina, or even excessive Trade Deadline acquisition Emmanuel Mudiay. Reservations about the first-year pro’s defensive readiness would be on a sound basis, if there were just about anyone other than Jack (Age 34, 25.9 MPG, 7.6 PPG, 0.6 SPG) who the Knicks could turn to for stops. SG: Wesley Matthews, Jr. (Mavericks) – The injury bug was a big factor, but few NBA career arcs have disappointed me as much as this Son of a Hawk’s (Age 31, 34.1 MPG, 40.9 FG%, 1.2 SPG, -4.5 plus-minus/game) has. While he looks the part, Wes has never entrenched himself as a skilled wing defender in this league. Yogi Ferrell has done well as he can, but there’s a reason the Mavs went after Doug McDermott at the Trade Deadline, and it will soon be time to start finding out why. SF: DeMarre Carroll (Nets) – He is Junk Yard Dawg-tired: watch any Nets game after Carroll (Age 31, 29.8 MPG, 6.5 missed FGs/game, 0.9 SPG) reaches the 25-minute mark and you can see he’s too gassed to do much of anything offensively. With Jahlil Okafor’s free agency coming up this summer, it is time to kick the tires on the early-season acquisition. Ideally, Kenny Atkinson would pair Okafor in the frontcourt with well-coiffed rookie Jarrett Allen, who can play as a more agile power forward. PF: Zach Randolph (Kings) – Had Scott Perry jumped to literally any team other than the Knicks, after bailing on the veterans he wooed to Sactown, he’d be up for Executive of the Year. The new nickname for Z-Bo (Age 36, 25.6 MPG, 6.5 missed FGs/game, 2.1 TOs/game, -5.2 plus-minus/game) is Falstaff, as he’s here purely for comic relief. Harry Giles is bubble-wrapped for this season, but there’s still plenty of time to turn the ball over to Skal Labissiere, once he returns after the Break from a strained shoulder. C: Marc Gasol (Grizzlies) – Can we go ahead and bronze the Memphian into a statue outside FedEx, and just get it over with? The hometown hero is not going to stay this bad, but we now see what happens to his game, once the team is bereft of Mike Conley and the glue guys that Gasol (Age 33, 33.9 MPG, 8.6 missed FGs/game, 32.6 3FG%, 2.7 TOs/game) meshed with for years. Back from knee soreness just in time for the Break, Deyonta Davis ought to get the lion’s share of Big Spain’s minutes from here on out. Bench: D.J. Augustin (Magic), Mario Chalmers (Grizzlies), Garrett Temple (Kings), Courtney Lee (Knicks), Ersan Ilyasova (HAWKS), Dirk Nowitzki (Mavericks), Marvin Williams (Hornets), J.J. Barea (Mavericks), Dwight Howard (Hornets) TANKWARS: REMAINING HEAD-TO-HEAD GAMES VERSUS FELLOW "BASEMENT 11" TEAMS Suns (18-41): 6 (@ Grizzlies, @ Hawks, @ Hornets, @ Magic, vs. Kings, @ Mavericks) out of 23 – The inverse of the Hawks, 5 of these six TankH2H games are on the road, a much easier path to the Tank Top for Phoenix. They might lose that Kings game anyway, as they’re an NBA-worst 9-21 at home. Just one comes on the back end of a back-to-back (Orlando, one day after visiting Cleveland). Despite holding the current tiebreaker for the #1 tank spot, Phoenix is 11-11 versus currently-below-.500 teams. There won’t be many more of those games left. [53 win% by all remaining opponents, as per playoffstatus.com] HAWKS (18-41): 6 (vs. Lakers, vs. Suns, vs. Bulls, vs. Hornets, @ Kings, vs. Magic) out of 23 – While TankWars rage on elsewhere, Atlanta will be through playing TankH2H after the April 1 game versus Orlando. The Kings might catch yet another W, as Atlanta’s an NBA-worst 5-24 on the road. They’re also an NBA-worst 8-30 in-conference. [53 win% by all remaining opponents] Mavericks (18-40): 10 (@ Lakers 2x, @ Bulls, vs. Grizzlies, @ Knicks, @ Nets, vs. Hornets, @ Kings, @ Magic, vs. Suns) out of 24 – Weird road trip after Dallas hosts Houston. Fly to New York to take on the Knicks, then off to Toronto, then back to NYC the next day, to face the Nets in Brooklyn. Mavs’ 10-28 record versus the West is worst in-conference. [48 win% by all remaining opponents] Magic (18-39): 11 (vs. Knicks, vs. Grizzlies, @ Lakers, @ Kings, vs. Suns, vs. Nets, vs. Bulls, @ Hawks, @ Knicks, vs. Mavericks, vs. Hornets) out of 25 – Quite a gauntlet for Orlando, as the final seven TankH2H games are in a row. Knicks and Mavs games are back-to-back. Only Atlanta (9-17) has a record worse than Orlando and Brooklyn (9-12) versus currently-below-.500 teams. [48 win% by all remaining opponents] Kings (18-39): 9 (vs. Lakers, vs. Nets, vs. Knicks, vs. Magic, vs. Hawks, vs. Mavericks, @ Lakers, @ Suns, @ Grizzlies) out of 25 – It could be an amazing run at Golden 1. Or unnerving, depending on where you sit. The first six TankH2H matchups for Sacramento are at home, the final three on the road. Knicks at home the sole TankH2H on the back side of a back-to-back. [50 win% by all remaining opponents] Grizzlies (18-38): 9 (vs. Suns, @ Magic, @ Bulls, @ Mavericks, vs. Bulls, @ Nets, @ Hornets, vs. Lakers, vs. Kings) out of 26 – Tennessee Tankers wouldn’t mind a re-alignment. Memphis is just 3-16 versus the East, and the road game in Charlotte comes one night after playing in Philly. Road games in Orlando and Dallas also come on the back end of a back-to-back, two of five such contests remaining (3-7 so far this season in that scenario). [48 win% by all remaining opponents] Nets (19-40): 10 (@ Hornets 2x, vs. Bulls 2x, @ Kings, vs. Mavericks, vs. Grizzlies, vs. Hornets, @ Magic, @ Bulls) out of 23 – Dallas, Memphis and Charlotte swing by Barclays for a three-game March Madness homestand. Two of three remaining back-to-backs for Brooklyn in that month: at home versus Chicago before traveling to Cleveland, and in Philadelphia before the homestand begins against the Mavs. [50 win% by all remaining opponents] Bulls (20-37): 11 (@ Nets 2x, @ Hornets, vs. Dallas, vs. Grizzlies, @ Hawks, @ Grizzlies, @ Knicks, @ Magic, vs. Hornets, vs. Nets) out of 25 – The only bottom-dwelling team at .500 (17-17) within their own conference, Chicago will face Brooklyn and Charlotte a total of five times, to say nothing of a Memphis team, twice, that’s league-worst versus Eastern clubs. First Nets-Hornets road trip is back-to-back. Magic game concludes a season-long 4-game road trip. That, and penultimate Nets game, are on back-ends as well. [48 win% by all remaining opponents] Knicks (23-36): 7 (@ Magic, @ Kings, vs. Mavericks, vs. Hornets, vs. Bulls, @ Hornets, vs. Magic) out of 23 – How the West Was Won? New York is break-even against the West (12-12), slightly better than Atlanta’s 10-11. Three TankH2H home games come during a season-high 5-game homestand in mid-March. Hornets game one of just two left on the back end of back-to-backs. In the East, only Atlanta (17) has more non-TankH2H games left. Oh, and no Unicorns. [51 win% by all remaining opponents] Lakers (23-33): 7 (vs. Mavericks 2x, @ Kings, @ Hawks, vs. Magic, @ Grizzlies, vs. Kings) out of 26 – Their 11-23 mark versus Western opponents is worst in that conference. Dallas and Sacramento are back-to-back, before Los Angeles flies cross-country to face the Hawks near the end of this month. Like the Hawks, the Lakers’ Tank Wars cease fire on April Fool’s Day, with big gaps between such meetings in March. Most non-TankH2H games among this group (19). [50 win% by all remaining opponents] Hornets (24-33): 12 (vs. Nets 2x, vs. Bulls, vs. Suns, @ Hawks, @ Knicks, @ Nets, vs. Grizzlies, @ Mavericks, vs. Knicks, @ Bulls, @ Magic) out of 25 – My, here’s a veritable Tank-a-palooza! Throw in that three of their four pending back-to-backs involve four of these games, plus three of the games are during a season-high 5-game road trip (ending in Brooklyn before they get home to deal with Memphis), and this thing could swing in either direction for Charlotte, who holds the best in-division record (8-4) among this collective. That’s thanks to the Magic and Hawks (6-0). They’ll have a chance to sweep them both, but on the road. [46 win% by all remaining opponents] ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 22, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 22, 2018 TANKWATCH GAME OF THE NIGHT: New York at Orlando: annnnnd we're back! TankWars rage on, as either the Knicks' 8-game skid or the Magic's 3-game slide ends tonight! Will Nikola Vucevic's and Aaron Gordon's returns make the difference? Can the Knicks not blow another twenty-plus lead, and will THJ's offense ever rear its head again? Finally, a familiar Tank Refrain from Coach Horny... ~lw3 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 23, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 23, 2018 Denzels, ranked: 1. Washington infinity-cubed. Valentine ~lw3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 23, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 23, 2018 TANKWATCH GAME OF THE NIGHT: Dallas at Los Angeles Lakers: Even with his owner's costly public predispositions, Mavs coach Rick Carlisle has no intentions of mailing it in. With all the unwelcome news swirling around his team (now ensnaring Dennis Smith, Jr. as well) and the stag party in the front office, can he get his team to channel their focus on picking up a rare road win? The Lakers want to get above .500 at home, end their 3-game losing streak, ease Lonzo Ball back into the rotation, and further ensure their 1st rounder goes to the Sixers and doesn't slide to the far-more-despised Celtics. ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 24, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 24, 2018 Ring the Tank Bell for... Charlotte! Caught a self-satisfied Wizards team napping, with Marvin, Kemba and Frank the Tank combining for 15 threes and cruising the Hornets to a big 17-point road win! Washington's been the best Tank Busters this season: it's their 10th loss against current sub-,500 teams, and that doesn't count early losses to teams like Miami and Philly that later got their act together. Speaking of Miami, a good one going in New Orleans. If the heat pull off the win in OT, Atlanta's Tragic Number goes down another digit! ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Premium Member aali34 Posted February 24, 2018 Premium Member Report Share Posted February 24, 2018 (edited) Jimmy Butler just got carried off the court. Hope its not too serious. ......But at the same time, the Timber-wolves losing a few games could make them the 8th seed. Edited February 24, 2018 by aali34 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 24, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 24, 2018 HAWKS TRAGIC NUMBER: I'm as surprised as you are, Esteban! Say, since just about all our draft stars are about to never play another college game again, can we just go ahead and replace March Madness with an early NBA Draft Lottery? ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 25, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 25, 2018 TANKWATCH GAME OF THE NIGHT: Los Angeles Lakers at Sacramento: Somebody's gotta win! Buried at the buzzer by Westbrook, can the Kings at least avoid a third-straight loss, playing once again at home, against a Lakers team that's also on the back end of a back-to-back? De'Aaron Fox should be back after a bout with conjunctivitis. But it seems an injury-managed Lonzo Ball will "duck" Fox this time around, too! ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 25, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 25, 2018 TANKWATCH: Suns up 7 on Portland with 4 minutes to play! Mavs down just 4 with under 4 minutes left! Do You Believe in Miracles? ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 25, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 25, 2018 ~lw3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 25, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 25, 2018 Go Dwight Go! ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 27, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 27, 2018 TANKWATCH GAME OF THE NIGHT: Chicago at Brooklyn: 44 consecutive losses among the NBA's Bottom 8 ends tonight! Zach LaVine is being held out and will play tomorrow in Charlotte. So the big showdown between upstart guards is Kris Dunn versus Spencer Dinwiddie! ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 27, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 27, 2018 HAWKS TRAGIC NUMBER: Not many more lives left for this Tragic Number! ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 27, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 27, 2018 TANKWATCH Teams that had a lead at halftime... * Knicks (vs. GSW) * Suns (at NOP) * Magic (at OKC) * Bulls (at BRK) * Mavericks (vs. IND) ...will Dallas be the only one of those teams to win tonight? ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 27, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 27, 2018 Ring the Tank Bell for... Dallas! Nothing easy for the Mavs' starters, but they get the rare W thanks to the Law Firm of Barea and McDermott! Hawks end the night at #2 on the Tank Rank! (tied w/ PHX) ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 28, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 28, 2018 TANKWATCH GAME OF THE NIGHT: Chicago at Charlotte: Dwight Howard and the Hornets are going for 5 wins in a row! With Robin Lopez being shelved in favor of youthful upstarts, can Cristiano Felicio provide any meaningful resistance? (Okay, the answer is no.) Still, might the Bulls avoid losing five-straight with Zach LaVine back in the lineup? UPDATE: We got us a Tank War casualty already! And it's a usual suspect! UPDATE x2: Here's some more BuzzKill for ya! ...but not before D12 did this! (say, did somebody mention Bob Pettit lately?) Tragic Number Watch: Root for the heat to win at home against the Sixers to see the Hawks' Tragic Number go down yet another digit tonight! ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 28, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 28, 2018 HAWKS TRAGIC NUMBER: 8 is great! Thanks, D-Wade! C'mon Darvin, you can get up there higher than that! ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted February 28, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted February 28, 2018 TANKWATCH GAME OF THE NIGHT: Phoenix at Memphis: Someone is going to get their first win in February! Which is good, since it's the last day of the month! Still no Tyreke for the Grizzlies after getting poked in the ribs in his last game. No TnT (Tyson Chandler and Tyler Ulis) for the Suns, either. Who wins this month's War of Attrition? And who joins the Mount Rushmore of February Flops? ~lw3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaceCase Posted February 28, 2018 Report Share Posted February 28, 2018 3 hours ago, lethalweapon3 said: TANKWATCH GAME OF THE NIGHT: Phoenix at Memphis: Someone is going to get their first win in February! Which is good, since it's the last day of the month! Still no Tyreke for the Grizzlies after getting poked in the ribs in his last game. No TnT (Tyson Chandler and Tyler Ulis) for the Suns, either. Who wins this month's War of Attrition? And who joins the Mount Rushmore of February Flops? ~lw3 Out of respect for Black History Month the Grizz must win against the state that refused to celebrate MLK day. *looks at tank standings* Okay... a win for Phoenix is a win for Atlanta thus continuing the celebration of Black History Month. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators lethalweapon3 Posted March 1, 2018 Author Moderators Report Share Posted March 1, 2018 TANKWATCH: I believe in Magic! Orlando giving the Raptors the what-for, down just 6 after holding a late 3rd quarter lead! Oh, and for lulz, this happened: ~lw3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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